Introducing Lulu

Tonight I went out on a date with my good friend Lulu for dinner and drinks. (Her name isn't actually Lulu I gave her a nickname for this blog to protect anonymity and because nicknames are fun.) We went downtown to Fedora Social Club. We had fondue and candy flavored/named martinis. (These are extremely dangerous because they taste like kool-aid.) Dinner was good and then we wondered around downtown a while before we settled in at a window side table at the bistro to people watch. Which is where we noticed an epidemic.Young women wearing little clothing in below freezing weather. For example, tonight it was 20 degrees outside and there were several women in mini dresses. That means the shoulders were exposed and so were the legs. Another outfit we saw tonight was a girl wearing a romper. Those are appropriate in the summer only if you insist on wearing an outfit meant for a 3 year old. At least this lady tried and wore some tights under it but then she was mixing her seasons which was just as awkward as a grown woman wearing a romper. Personally, when it's cold out I put more clothes on not take them off but I guess I must be in the minority. This also makes me worried that if women are wearing that little of clothing in the dead of winter then what will they be wearing in the summer when just being outside makes you sweat bullets? A bikini? Pasties? I don't even want to imagine it. Another thing I noticed was how many women wear high heels that they cannot walk in. If your trying so hard to walk in your heels that your knees are noticeably bent you shouldn't be wearing them. If your legs look like you just got off a horse you shouldn't be wearing them. If you are walking like you are in a half squat then you shouldn't be wearing them. No, you do not look hot in high heels that you cannot walk in. And yes, everyone does notice. I feel like it is my moral obligation and civic duty to mock you mercilessly if you insist on wearing ridiculous outfits in public.

Just a friendly heads up, be ready to hear more about Lulu. She is my partner in crime and feels the same way as I do on almost everything. I will be posting more about her soon so be ready for it.